Cataclysm: A Review in Haiku

90 Troll Shaman
11850
Using the standard 5-7-5 syllable haiku format, here is my humble series of reviews on Cataclysm content. Enjoy!

Mt. Hyjal
Roll down the mountain
Waking the old and idle
Twilightlydamus

Vashjir
Far beneath the waves
We cannot escape the depths
Where is sea lord gone?

Deepholm
Round and round we go
Chasing the missing pebble
Fat lady watches

Uldum
Join tiresome hero
-- CUT SCENE --
Who's got the camels?

Twilight Highlands
All board the airship
Watch as the two dragons fight
Lets all get married

Molten Front
Druids need our help
My tree is bigger than yours
All i see is fire

Zul'Roics
Old trolls will troll you
Trying to catch a pony
Everybody Dies

Raidfinder
Open the gates to all
Falling backwards to the goal
See how they complain

Archeology
Hunt for lost treasure
Now i wish i was fishing
Digging just to dig

And finally, WOW: Cataclysm
Silly dragon roars
While we stand outside the bank
Nothing else to do

Please submit your cataclysm haikus here!
Edited by Grringo on 23/08/2012 16:54 BST
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86 Goblin Shaman
10615
A rogue stunlocked me
Frost Mages are still OP
Guess I'll AFK
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90 Human Mage
0
Great stuff at the start
Soon things started to get nerfed
Wished challenge would last
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90 Troll Shaman
11850
Another one for Thrall:

Green Jesus needs me
Watch as he saves the whole world
Now he's the daddy
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90 Human Warlock
13070
People raced to 85
Then to kill all bosses first
Then wonder they "No More?"

On the P T R
We learn to kill the boss instead
Not test builds for bugs.

On new patch day week,
We pushed. Our progress: too far?
We cleared all bosses.

Blizzard! The angry cry
You made not enough content
For our foolish haste.
Edited by Dhamploc on 23/08/2012 18:08 BST
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MVP - WoW, StarCraft II
90 Worgen Druid
9180
Interesting villain I saw
Madness he tried to portray
comical silliness remained

Worgen announced
Cringed? I did indeed
Now, of them I am

(A positive and negative one for balance! I suck at Haikus. :[ )
Edited by Danellos on 27/08/2012 22:37 BST
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90 Human Warrior
9185
@OP
Some don't stick to the 5-7-5 rule, but I like how they're written. As I understand, a haiku should include some kind of wit, and ideally a surprise, a pointe, something unexpected or unconventional. After all, it's poetry.
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64 Gnome Rogue
13075
Ermahgerd
A Bermb
Is it savior?
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90 Night Elf Mage
10255
Cìd has the right idea.

/applaud
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90 Troll Warrior
13490
Warrior charges
But he is so squishy
I am not scared
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90 Human Warrior
9185
By the way... Would you invite someone into your raid group who can't follow the simple 5-7-5 syllable rule? :p
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90 Troll Shaman
11850
23/08/2012 20:29Posted by Chromeson
By the way... Would you invite someone into your raid group who can't follow the simple 5-7-5 syllable rule? :p


Rules are there to break
A team needs all together
Don't stand in the fire!
Edited by Grringo on 23/08/2012 20:36 BST
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90 Human Warrior
9185
Frequent problem with raid briefings in WoW:

A: Don't stand in the fire!
A: I repeat: Don't stand in the fire on the ground when it appears.
A: Move out of it if it spawns under your feet.
A: All clear?
B: Yes.
A: What should you not do?
B: Hm?
A: What is clear?
B: What do you mean?
A: Did you read what I just wrote?
B: Dude! YES!!! Let's go.
A: So what should you do when there's fire?
B: What fire?!
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90 Human Rogue
13330
Ro-gues - are O-P!
Q-Q dra-ma - I - am - mad
Fo-rums - here - I - come!
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Community
Thank you for posting
your feedback is important
be it good or bad
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90 Draenei Shaman
12165
Interesting villain I saw
Madness he tried to portray
Nothing but comical silliness remained

ಠ_ಠ ಠ_ಠ ಠ_ಠ ಠ_ಠ ಠ_ಠ
ಠ_ಠ ಠ_ಠ ಠ_ಠ ಠ_ಠ ಠ_ಠ ಠ_ಠ ಠ_ಠ
ಠ_ಠ ಠ_ಠ ಠ_ಠ ಠ_ಠ ಠ_ಠ
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90 Undead Warlock
10905
The start was pretty solid
Then the world was shaken upside down
Now it appears easy

I still like 25man raids
Inside my heart weeps silently in pain
If this continues disbands ensue

I've not had my coffee yet, my apologies.
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85 Orc Warrior
9335
Abyssal Maw

Glee at the prospects
Only for it to be canned
Sums up the expac

Raid Finder Loot

Don't want to be here
Just boosting Tanks to 4 sets
1 pug gets all gear

Make a haiku thread
It helps with verbosity
Feedback negative
Edited by Grundy on 24/08/2012 10:22 BST
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85 Blood Elf Rogue
6520
Archeology
Now i wish i was fishing


i laughed at this.

I have no idea what Haiku is or what the 5-7-5 stands for.
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